No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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