And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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