He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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