so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
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The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
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