I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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