It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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