I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
