so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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