Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
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