Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize