i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
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