can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Randomize
