it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize