Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize