my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
