HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
