hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
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