Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
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