I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Randomize
