Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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