id be glad to
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
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