let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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