Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Randomize