drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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