You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize