I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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