They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
you had me at cake vodka
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
not ubering you a puppy
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Randomize
