i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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