Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(807): View more from Ontario

discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.

Fav 29 5787 874
share tweet
(386): View more from Florida

According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.

Fav 25 1003 6646
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(806): View more from Texas

For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.

Fav 7 3692 1032
share tweet
(813): View more from Florida

obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.

Fav 0 814 1575
share tweet
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(916): View more from California

No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.

Fav 12 1372 2336
share tweet
(208): View more from Idaho

I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying

Fav 8 785 1667
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(757): View more from Virginia

he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire

Fav 5 1603 709
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(336): View more from North Carolina

" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."

Fav 2 880 454
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(510): View more from California

The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.

Fav 1 52 10
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT