:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MIDGETS
????
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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