all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
