When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Dick very happy bro
I forgot wine drunk hurts
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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