He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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