it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Barsexuality is the new black.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
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The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
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Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I just forgot I was standing up.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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