There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize