I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
