remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
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