I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
is it fun? or sober?
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