we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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