Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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