Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
