he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Randomize
