I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Randomize
