its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
