Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
