You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize