I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
