There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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