dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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