I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Randomize
